awesome_lilly: (she's got an idea)
[personal profile] awesome_lilly
Lilly was raised in a luxurious house in the town of Nepune, California. Her favorites pasttimes were numerous, frequently illegal, and often included tormenting boys.

Then she died. Normally this would be the end of the story, but while Miracle Max was unavailable, another sort of miracle happened to her anyway. She ended up in Milliways Bar.

There were boys she could torment in Milliways Bar, too. One of them was named Inigo Montoya, but she never called him that. Just Inigo. Nothing gave Lilly as much pleasure as having a drink with Inigo. Well, not nothing, but it was still pretty fun!

"Inigo, buy me a drink. I want to see the bottom of this bottle by morning."

Inigo had already had a drink and incidentally been sprinkled with love-in-idleness.

He said "As you wish." (More or less.)

As you wish was far from all he ever said to her, though. He said she was entrancing, and lovely, and wonderful, and Lilly said he had excellent taste and bought the next round.

That night, Lilly was amazed to discover that when Inigo was saying "I love you," what he really meant was "I have been drugged by your husband." And even more amazing than that was the moment when she realized she wasn't going to take advantage of this to have sex with Inigo effin' Montoya.. Afterlife is pain. Anyone who says differently is selling something.

She did, however, make out with him for a while. (Sorry, this is a kissing oom.)

It was a very emotional night for Lilly. She had to get Inigo to swallow a Klatchian coffee bean, the kind they use to make the coffee that turns people knurd.

"Here," she said, handing Inigo a small brown lump. "Swallow this. The chocolate coating'll make it go do- okay then."

Inigo, needing no convincing to do his true love's bidding, swallowed the pill. A moment went by.

Inigo fell off of his stool. (To be fair, he'd also had rather a lot of alcohol.)

Lilly leaned over him.

"Let me explain- no. There's too much. Let me sum up. There's a plague of love potion going around the bar, you got hit with it, saw me, and fell in love. It was only temporary. You're good now."

"...inconceivable." Inigo managed. Lilly laughed.

"You can't use that word in Milliways. I don't think Bar thinks it means what we think it means." She patted him on the head. "You're a really good kisser, though. Maybe we should do this again sometime."

Falling suddenly in and just as suddenly back out of love can be confusing--especially when one adds alcohol into the mix. But Inigo was nothing if not resilient. And, while pleased to hear that Lilly found him a good kisser, he considered that he probably made a better Dread Pirate Roberts unattached.

(Lilly, on the other hand, just didn't want to break him and Fezzik up.)

September 2012

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