bernard's birthday party

[awesome_lilly]

Lilly did not want to get up early. The tequila she had last night did not want her to get up early either. However, she has trouble to get into so she's down at the bar early. She orders a carafe of coffee and spends some time chatting with bar. Eventually, she walks away with the key to a private room, among other things.

It's a few hours later now, and an immense amount of coffee has been consumed, and the room has been transformed. There are empty tequila bottles acting as vases for bouquets of purple and blue and in concession to Bernard's taste, black balloons. There are streamers made from exotic labels off of strange and occasionally familiar bottles of alcohol. There are comfy chairs scattered around for conversation and hiding behind once Bernard arrives. There's music all ready, Bob Dylan and the White Stripes and a few other things she thinks he might like. There is a neon-bright sign across the back of the room reading HAPPY BIRTHDAY BERNARD!" There's also a table with a lone, flamboyantly wrapped package on it with a tag reading "To Bernard, Happy Birthday, Love Lilly, P.S. Please To Be Not Killing Me Before Opening."

Now all she needs are guests.

Comments

[bythebrook.livejournal.com]

Ophelia bounces in.

"Bernard's birthday! And Lilly! He didn't tell me!"

[awesome_lilly]

"Ophelia!" Lilly's thrilled to see her.

"He didn't tell anyone, I dragged it out of him over tequila last night. But I think he'll like the party anyway... maybe."

And she grins.

[fairest1.livejournal.com]

*Snow has recieved the note at some point in millitime. She's there, with the twins and a wrapped box.

The wrapping paper is black with a dynamite-stick pattern and a red bow*

I take it this is where the party's being held?

[awesome_lilly]

Lilly smiles happily at her.

"It is indeed! Thanks so much for coming, Bernard may or may not appreciate it but I really do. Presents go on the table, and food and drinks are available from the bar in the corner."

[faithful-slayer.livejournal.com]

Guest.

Slayer.

Standing in the doorway, watching Lilly finish putting stuff together.

"...when did you get back?"

[awesome_lilly]

Lilly turns, and smiles.

"Hey Faith. Last night, actually. I'm sorry if I freaked anyone out, I hear I was only gone two days, though."

[i_vanquish_evil]

Beowulf trots in...

He didn't read the note - he's a DOG -

He just followed his nose... and took advantage of the fact that Van Helsing let him stay with Faith last night and Faith just let him out in the morning; he's been wandering around ever since. Normally he'd seek out his master, but, today, there was party-smell... so, off he went.

Beowulf, the large Irish Wolfhound, is at the party.

[awesome_lilly]

Lilly waves at the dog and makes sure that the bar can provide water or treats or whatever he needs.

[timsbooks.livejournal.com]

*Tim wanders up to the door, a rather large box floating behind him. Theres a good chance whatever is inside is explosive. He figures if theres going to be explosions, it's better to offer them.*

[awesome_lilly]

Lilly greets him happily.

"Hey Tim, good to see you! Presents on table, and help yourself to anything you want!"

[artsmartscarlet.livejournal.com]

Jane wanders in, half her attention on her sketchbook. She might still be working on a present - in fact, she probably is.
"This where the party is, then?"

[awesome_lilly]

"This is it," Lilly replies. "I'm Lilly, your soon-to-be-exploded hostess and I'm happy you could make it!"

[henry-jones-jr.livejournal.com]

In standard, but nicely pressed, khakis and a gray polo shirt, Indy strolls in with Delia. He's seen the set up already, but a party always looks even better when the room is full of guests. He gives a respectful nod as he looks around. Lilly did brilliantly.

[eldorne-girl.livejournal.com]

Delia liked New York, yes she did. Also the clothes, which is why she's wearing a sleevless white linen top with delicate Chinese flowers and a knee-length jade-green skirt. She looks, altogether, very lovely - as per normal.

"Indy," she comments thoughtfully as the ballons remind her, "did you ever get that sum to work?"

[young_tmriddle]

*Even with Gavroche missing, Tom wouldn't miss Bernard's birthday.*

I understand the surprise birthday party for Bernard is here.

[smallestopener]

*Ingress could use a happy event this week. She holds Tom's hand and looks much more her usual smiling self.*

[the-woodpecker.livejournal.com]

*Bernard and Lilly walk into the room, Bernard looking more than a little wary.*

[smallestopener]

SURPRISE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*Ingress jumps up and down. Her voice is quite loud for such a little girl.*

[sai_delgado]

"Surprise!"

She's in a corner of the room, but oh her smile is bright and shining.

[henry-jones-jr.livejournal.com]

Indy does not yell anything, because that's not his style. But he does blow a paper party razzer that unrolls and toots loudly once everyone else's screams have died away. He looks around awkwardly.

[young_tmriddle]

*Tom watches Bernard's expression with amusement.*

Surprise, Bernard. Happiest of birthdays to you.

[nonookie4u.livejournal.com]

Lysistrata peeks into the room and asks to no one in particular, "May I join you"

[nitro-is-ace.livejournal.com]

At some point Ace wanders in. She's a bit battered and bruised, and is looking forward to a nice, long hot bath, but she has a present to drop off.
A small, rectangular package is set on the table. Inside? A copy of 'Darwin Awards', with a note inside in distinctive Ace-scrawl.

Bernard -
For when you think patrons are being particularly dense. Enjoy!
-Ace

[awesome_lilly]

Sometime after everyone's greeted Bernard, tequila has been drunk and everything is going... well, better... Lilly moves to the center of the room, and signals for silence.

"Ladies and Gentleman and Bernard, may I have your attention please? I’ve arranged a little entertainment for the birthday boy, and I don’t think you want to miss it."

She hits the lights, and a disco ball descends from the ceiling and lights start flashing along what now appears to be an impromptu runway.

"For tonight’s entertainment, please welcome the Lovely Xanderella!"

[xan-shaped.livejournal.com]

There's a pause in which absolutely nothing happens.

"I changed my mind!" Xander's voice hisses. "Find somebody else!"

"Xander, I did NOT just waste all that tequila to have you chicken out!"

Slowly, dragging his feet and trying very hard not to look anybody in the face, Xander emerges. He is in a blonde wig, saddle shoes, knee-high stockings, a midriff-baring blouse (and, apparently, breasts-- or at least a bra), and a plaid miniskirt, The looks is early Britney Spears.

However, the blue eyeshadow and hot pink lipstick don't look half bad.

Xander has his eye shut tight, looking as if he is summoning the courage to face the imminent removal of his bowels. Music begins.

Cruised into a bar on the shore
Her picture graced the grime on the door
She a long lost love at first bite
Baby maybe you're wrong but you know it's all right
That's right

Reluctantly, and no doubt entirely due to the looks Lilly is giving him, Xander begins to dance. The dance is also reminiscent of early Britney Spears-- if Britney Spears had ever been a horribly mortified young man in an eye patch.

Backstage we're having the time
of our lives until somebody say
Forgive me if I seem out of line
Then she whipped out of her gun
tried to blow me away

On these last lines, Xander makes his hands into "guns" and points them at his audience, whipping his wig around with a toss of his head. If you watch his face carefully, you will see the terror in his eye.

Dude looks like a lady

Xander sashays unwillingly.

Dude looks like a lady!

"Thrust, dammit!" Lilly mouths furiously. "THRUST!"

Dude looks like a lady!

And, giving Lilly a glare, Xander swings his hips, working up to unsteady gyrations.

Dude looks like a lady!

And pelvic thrusts.

Baby let me follow you down
Let me take peek dear

But only a few!

Baby let me follow you down
Do me, do me, do me all night

Xander points at himself, then at Bernard. If you ask, it's part of the choreography.

Baby let me follow you down
Turn the other cheek dear

He hesitates, but turns his back to the audience and shakes it. Yes, it.

Baby let me follow you down
Do me, do me, do me, sue me ...

Now a funkier, more electronic beat starts, and Xander starts to unbutton his blouse.

Girl!
I wanna take you to a gay bar,
I wanna take you to a gay bar,
I wanna take you to a gay bar, gay bar, gay bar!

Having successfully unbuttoned it after only moderate fumbling and profanity, Xander shrugs his shoulders and takes it off. It is then discovered by onlookers that he has not, in fact, grown breasts, but is merely wearing a heavily padded bra.

I've got something to put in you,
I've got something to put in you

With considerably more fumbling and profanity, Xander unhooks the bra, whips it around his head halfheartedly several times, and throws it into the assembled guests.

I've got something to put in you

Unfortunately, the bra lands on Bernard's head.

"Oh, SHIT!"

At the gay bar, gay bar, gay bar.
Wow!

[mnt_raph]

*Raph has sort of slunk into the room. He's really just here to see the look on Bernard's face when he comes through the door. It ought to be entertaining, to say the least.

Standing in a corner, Raph nurses a beer.*

[awesome_lilly]

After the striptease, Lilly spots someone she hasn't met yet.

"Hey, welcome to the party! Sorry I didn't say hi earlier, I'm Lilly, your about to-be-exploded hostess. Are you enjoying yourself so far?"